Celebrations/Strengths: Imagine papers full of writing everywhere, brainstorm sheets, ideas, descriptive words. Imagine constant typing and writing, then erasing and undoing, then repeating that 20x and more. Imagine stressing out and your brain hurting from thinking. Imagine drafts and drafts of one single piece of writing. Now, feel the relief of finishing. Feel proudness and success of this single piece of writing. Feel the joy and excitement when reading it outloud. Hold head high up and your voice loud with confidence. Writing is one of the best celebrations I have because I completely feel that I have changed, and I have found myself in writing. Some of my favorite pieces are from my 5 vignettes because I wrote about some things that were hard to talk about or explain and added a lot of imagery and description in so they sounded really good and I was very proud of them. At moments of the process of creating it does make me frustrated at times but it also makes me really happy that I have pride in something I created by myself. It comes in a package, if you want something you work for it. Ms Britt has taught me many lessons that have helped me understand this and help me acheive this. I learned that in order to really achieve in something, you need to push yourself, you need to struggle to produce or to gain. Without struggle you can't produce, you can't gain anything. And most of all you can’t give up.
Ever since I was little I would never talk to anyone except 2 people. I was always shy to talk to others because I felt like they would judge me or not like me. I always had that feeling inside of me wanting to burst out to get in a conversation that I totally related to, but I never had the courage and guts to just do it. Nowadays these past couple of years I have been changing and really starting to show people how I actually am. Just a regular girl, with 6 toes. I’m just kidding I am not really that regular I am very weird. My personality is nothing people really except for me to be like. Asking people if they thought I would be the way I am to them right now makes me crack up because they always say they didn’t expect it at all. I feel as if I have really grown in communicating and meeting new people. When walking into to class for the first day of 9th grade, I came in with a mission. To stop being such a turd and just open up to people about who I really am. Slowly throughout the year this started happening and now I talk to people that have been in my class for 4 years and who I have never talked to before. Now ending the school year with me singing as loud as I can or dancing in front of the class and not even thinking or caring about what others think is a big difference since the beginning. Ms Regina and Ms Britt both extremely helped in this by creating activities and sitting us with people we don’t usually talked to. Not only my teachers but also my peers, they have been super supportive and nice to me and this really brings up my confidence because I realized that there is really nothing to be afraid of. I am super proud of myself for this because I have come so far and I know I haven't fully diluted this shyness completely but I know it will soon.
This year we read The House on Mango Street, and I loved it. This book is full of symbolism and you really need to read into it and break it down to actually understand it. It amazes me how someone can possibly create something so symbolic and very deep like this author and book. It’s really cool to me that someone can catch those things easily in writing. I have not only been able to understand and do this but I have also been writing with a lot of symbolism. Here is a piece named The House on The Block, My house is the house that was pure dirt nine years ago. The house with a huge backyard where 3 dogs wander around. Lemons and oranges that have fallen under their trees. My house is the house to get the most attention on the block. Even the most attention to burglars. My house has windows everywhere and rooms and rooms. The house that has papers all over the office stacked on the floor, tables and corners of the room. The house on the block with trucks in our property. The house with bushes of flowers and surrounded by green. I live where pink and white doves fly above our house in the mornings. The house that gets half decorated for Christmas because there is “no time”. My house is the house that not everyone usually gets to have and might seem to have everything. And it does, not because of the appearance but because all our memories that we have gone through in this house, on the block. This piece was inspired by The House on Mango Street. If you didn’t catch on to some of the symbolism from this piece, it’s okay here are some I tried sliding in. In the whole piece I was describing not only where I live but basically my childhood. I ended with all the memories and naming it the house on the block because these are my memories. When I said “The house that has papers all over the office stacked on the floor, tables and corners of the room”, also “The house that gets half decorated for Christmas because there is “no time””, was symbolising that my parents are very busy and sometimes don’t have time to do many things. But at the end I decided to write about the memories in the house also because it was the good memories that my parents have made with us. So all though they might be busy we always have enough time be together. This was one of the first writing pieces I added symbolism in. Before I wasn’t able to do it as much as now. I didn’t really understand the concept, it wasn't clicking because I didn’t know there was a world of possibilities you can do to find the symbolism. I wanted to specifically follow the directions, but you can’t really follow anything. This is one thing I like about reading into writing too, you have freedom and there is no right or wrong answers.
Areas of Growth:
Two things I want to grow more on for next year is group work and working on things in class. I have seen during the course of middle school and this first year of high school that I usually I really like and much so prefer doing things independently. Although I still try working with what has been given to me and with my group I just honestly work much better by myself. I feel as if when working at school I get more distracted and don’t think as much as I would if I was alone. I also tend to make mistakes because I will rush on it. I cannot concentrate when there noise, even little taps someone is making I can hear. I always notice this, but this was also recently happening with the Star testing. People kept talking or I can hear people outside because every noise gets louder in my head. This is a big problem because either time runs out and I couldn’t think at all, or I get very frustrated. When I am at home, I go to my room and sit down when it’s quiet and just think and if I need more information on anything I am working on; I tend to look up things like the meaning of a word or finding steps to a problem if not understanding something, and I won’t really do this at school. One thing I can do to fix this is sitting down with people who won’t distract me or be in a place where it’s quiet. Group work is one of things that is like… I really prefer not doing it but I can somewhat manage. I don’t want to sound bad or anything but I am a perfectionist and I don’t really like when people get involved in my things because they don’t make the things like I would normally try creating perfect, but I don’t want to not involve them so I just go along, when really inside I feel like exploding and just taking charge. This is also one reason why group work doesn’t always roll with me because I am a person that likes taking charge, I have really diluted this but it’s all inside. Me wanting to just do everything, but I know that is not the right thing to do although sometimes it ends up happening. I also like working by myself because sometimes we are paired with people who just get distracted easily or don’t do work, and it is frustrating because I am a person who always tries finishing something and not leaving things last minute, I would even do the work by myself at home if I had to. One thing I can do to fix this is stepping back a bit and letting others step up and I am learning to be proud of anything I am involved in. I really want to work on both of these things because they are essentials and are things that can help me in the future.
Question: My question I have for you is what differences have you seen change in me throughout the year? Academically or physically or personality..Anything, just a change. And...I have a bonus:) what do you see me doing in the future?