As a person and an artist, I’m a perfectionist. This could be a good thing but also a bad thing. I’m the type of person to always give 100% in my work, and I’ve never turned in something I ‘m not proud of or satisfied with. This is a great quality because I’ll constantly be turning in good work, but so much time and mental energy is used. I could be writing a short reflection for an hour, or be taking notes with drawings that make me stay up till 1 in the morning. I put so much effort into one thing, then realize I need to be doing so many more assignments. This is stressful because inside, I put myself up to a level where I always have to hit, where I always have to create something amazing. If I don’t, is it even Nicole’s work? I constantly have this pressure of wanting to be the best. I’m so hard on myself, there’s no inbetween. As an athlete, I get home around 7pm. I have to eat, shower, and do homework before going to bed. It’s hard because your body is physically tired and it’s hard to focus on work. Your body just wants to sleep. But again, the little me in my head pokes me about having perfect work, it pushes any energy I have out of me to do it. I end up sleeping very late, which means I’ll have to get dragged out of bed in the morning for school the next day. Junior year was when I started being so tired during school, I tried resting my head on the table for at least a minute. I wasn’t getting enough sleep. But I had to finish all my work. If I didn’t, I would feel like I failed being a student. On top of that, doing honors work is a mandatory, having A’s is a must. My parents don’t even bug me about my grades, it’s me as a person who always strives for the extra mile. The pressure is what makes me, me.
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